It’s about the LOVE

Perhaps the thing that I find most helpful is remembering love. 

Love unites. It brings us together. Together with others and also together within ourselves. Love is about connection. Love makes us whole. Love is part of everything. It animates us as human beings. 

It’s the nurturing that a mother gives her offspring, it’s the perfection of the creation of Nature, it’s the kindness that humans share with one another, it’s the warmth of a hug, it’s the divine within and around us. 

Love is an immense force. It heals all, if we let it. And if we learn to make the most of it. 

Let’s take a moment to consider the concept of self-love. Many of us are in the habit of sacrificing ourselves for the sake of others. I used to believe this was the only way to be a good person, and that love was something that you give to and get from others.

But I ask you to consider the possibility that, to be a good and loving person, we must start with ourselves, and that means learning to FEEL love within ourselves. 

“Your vision will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.”    Carl Jung

Ok so how do we do that? We have to switch things around a little, and start to pay attention to the love within us. For many, it isn’t easy, because feeling the love within us is in fact, an act of self-love. And in some ways, we’ve been taught to think that’s selfish or unimportant. But I disagree. 

Let’s look at another quote about love: Jesus said, “Love thy neighbor as thyself.” 

I used to think that that meant taking care of everyone else. But then I realized that if I don’t know how to love myself, how can I know how to love anyone else? This was a real eye-opener for me. As a physician, I was all about taking care of other people. But if I sacrifice too much of myself, I will have nothing else to give.

It starts to make sense when you really think about it. Secure your own oxygen mask before helping others. We must first be in a good place ourselves so that goodness can then be shared with others. 

This means we must be whole, we must take care of our own health, that we must rest when we need it, nourish ourselves with healthy food, spend time in nature, and do things that make us feel good. Only from this place can we really take care of those around us.

It has helped me so much, on so many levels, to do this work of self-love, self-compassion, and self-care. And I also see the amazing things it does for those who start to do it for themselves. 

To be clear, I’m not talking about selfishness. We need to be healthy, rested, and whole. This helps us to be kind, strong, patient, and good for those around us. This can include what we spend our time doing, what we put into our bodies, or who we spend our time with. What’s good is good so taking good care of ourselves helps us to take good care of others. 

We must know how to first love ourselves, so we can truly know how to love others. It’s what the Buddha taught about the importance of compassion: 

“If your compassion does not include yourself, it is incomplete.”

So how do we do it? Allow ourselves to feel self-love? This is the love that you must first give to yourself in order to receive it. You give it to yourself when you allow yourself to feel it on the inside. Inside our hearts and, even better, inside our entire being. 

I’ve found that we can do that most easily by connecting with ourselves on the inside, and we do that most easily by feeling it. Love is a feeling, and we can feel that inner Love in many ways. It might be a sensation of warmth in our belly, or peace in our hearts, or light from the sunshine that warms us to our core.

Take a moment and feel the Love. Can you feel a sense of warmth, light, or peace? All of these are manifestations of love. The more we allow ourselves to feel it, the more love we have access to, and the better things go.

If we think too much about the definition of love, we can complicate things. Love isn’t a thought or idea. Love is a force, a feeling, an intangible, beautiful vitality within all conscious beings. 

Love is a profound but simple thing. And it helps us if we don’t complicate it by thinking too much. The beautiful simplicity of Love is that it can free us from the complicated story that is keeping us from healing, from transforming, and from freedom. It’s the narrative and the thoughts that can keep us from feeling the Love.

Emanuel Swedenborg, a Swedish theologian, scientist, and philosopher, put it this way: "Love in its essence is spiritual fire."

Love is the fire burning within, our inner hearth, the compassion that we give ourselves in the midst of a challenge. 

Love animates us, guides us, heals us. Love is our Health, our Happiness, our Holiness.

Can you allow yourself to feel the warmth? To feel your own Love fire in your heart and in the core of your being? It’s warmth, it's light. It’s inside you and outside you in every moment, just waiting for you to give it to yourself by feeling it. Love is the answer. Can you feel the love within you?

Like I said, Love is what animates us, and it is a beautiful part of our humanness because we can consciously choose it in every moment if we allow ourselves to. If we’re willing to give that gift of love to ourselves. 

It’s only complicated when we complicate it or limit it. Let it flow. Save yourself by receiving it. Let it grow. Heal yourself by feeling it. Let it light up your heart and your soul. It’s you, and it's yours.

Can you feel it? Will you let yourself be healed by it? Love yourself so you can better know how to love others? 

Make it easy on yourself by keeping it simple and remembering and connecting to your inner hearth, the firelight of the love within you.  The next time you’re in the midst of a challenge, feel the love. It’s always there for you; it’s always inside you, and when you allow yourself to feel it, it’s a powerful act of self-love that can then be shared with those around you.

It can be so helpful to remember that Love is in and flows through everything. It has no limits, unless we limit it. So even when, and especially when, we’re in the midst of a difficult moment or a difficult situation, there is love even inside that difficulty. And one of the most important times to do it, to feel the love, is when things are challenging. Love is always inside us and the best thing we can do for ourselves in the moment, and in as many moments as possible, is connecting to and feeling this inner fire of Love. 

When I work with people, I often say, practice feeling it under ideal circumstances so you can also feel it in difficult circumstances. This is a powerful way to keep making the most of the beautiful power of love.

Remembering it's about the love and feeling it is one of the best things we can do for ourselves and those around us. But it only works if we do it. 

It’s about the love. Love is the answer. Let yourself feel the love. 

LOVE heals all.